


Amnesia

by OikawaDork



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Angst, I feel bad for torturing Mayuzumi xD, M/M, Pain, Songfic, poor akashi, poor mayuzumi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-23
Updated: 2020-01-23
Packaged: 2021-02-27 04:53:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,664
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22371370
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OikawaDork/pseuds/OikawaDork
Summary: I wish that I could wake up with amnesia. And forget about the stupid little thingsLike the way it felt to fall asleep next to you. And the memories I never can escape
Relationships: Akashi Seijuurou/Mayuzumi Chihiro, Akashi Seijuurou/Nijimura Shuuzou
Comments: 17
Kudos: 17





	Amnesia

**Author's Note:**

> I feel like the sadness wasn't enough. I feel disappointed at my writing skills here because I feel like it's still not worth crying over XD
> 
> But I still hope you guys like it even though this story might confuse you hehe
> 
> The song is Amnesia by 5sos. I like that band you guys also search one of their songs if you want

  


Mayuzumi wanders around the places where he used to hang out with a certain someone. Sitting beside the river under the Sakura tree. It's spring season and he was feeling lonely. Not that he's not used to it. He's always lonely. He watches as the sun sets with a longing expression on his face. A feeling of nostalgia waves through him. His chest hurts as he started to reminisce

  


_**I drove by all the places we used to hang out getting wasted.** _

_**I thought about our last kiss, how it felt the way you tasted** _

  


Mayuzumi closes his eyes as the memory pops up on his mind. The face of his lover, that is dear to him. Akashi was very special to him

  


_**And even though your friends tell me you're doing fine** _

  


Mayuzumi stood up and began to walk around

  


_**Are you somewhere feeling lonely even though he's right beside you?** _

_**When he says those words that hurt you, do you read the ones I wrote you?** _

  


Mayuzumi can't help but to think if Akashi was alright. If he is happy now that he's together with Nijimura. He couldn't help but worry if Nijimura was treating him right, if he is sweet to Akashi unlike him. He's wondering if he cared about Akashi enough unlike him–who doesn't show much effort in their relationship

  


Akashi and Mayuzumi were happy together. They were happy. Until Nijimura came to their lives and swiftly took the love of his life in his arms. It's not like Mayuzumi was blaming the ravenette, but that's what is seems. Mayuzumi knew that Akashi has loved Nijimura first. So he became wary of Nijimura. Actually afraid that Akashi would fall for him again

  


And he did 

  


It was like all the dreams and promises was thrown out of the window. All the memories and moments they shared vanished. Mayuzumi felt his world falling apart

  


_**Sometimes I start to wonder was it just a lie?** _

_**If what we had was real, how could you be fine?** _

  


Mayuzumi would sometimes think if he was just a rebound. Akashi made it look like the relationship was nothing. He was quick to move on because Nijimura was there, waiting for him

  


He thought if Akashi ever loved him.

  


Sure, it was also his fault to why Akashi left him. He didn't pay much attention to him. He thought he was giving him enough but he was not. But he's trying. To give Akashi all he needs

  


He really love Akashi. He just have a different way of showing it

  


But he always ask to why Akashi had already given up. 

  


_**I remember the day you told me you were leaving** _

_**I remember the tears running down your face** _

  


_"Chihiro, let's end this" Akashi told him, Mayuzumi was frozen in his seat and there was a long moment of silence in their shared apartment_

  


_"What?"_

  


_"It will be better if we separate" Akashi said, voice was cold and firm. Or it seems that Akashi was trying to control his voice cause he sounds like he was about to break down_

  


_"Seijuurou, why–" Mayuzumi suddenly stood up and his words were cut off_

  


_"I don't it anymore. I want to end it it!" Akashi had raised his voice a little silencing Mayuzumi_

  


_"Enough. Just—Please" Now that Akashi's voice sounds so weak. Mayuzumi could feel his heart shattering into pieces_

  


_"Wow, for three years. I guess I'm no match for that guy huh. I was still surpassed even though I tried real hard for you" Akashi's tears stream down his face hearing those words_

  


_"I-I'm sorry" Akashi told him as he started to cry_

  


_"Really Seijuurou.. I thought things are okay but I was wrong. I should have known"_

  


_Mayuzumi wanted to ask him why give up immediately. But he doesn't and let the love of his life walk away from him_

  


_**And the dreams you left behind you didn't need them** _

_**Like every single wish we ever made** _

  


_"Chihiro, why are you so handsome?" Akashi blurted as Mayuzumi furrowed his eyebrows_

  


_"Why are you saying this all of a sudden??"_

  


_"Is it bad that I just want to admire my boyfriend's facial features?" Akashi said with a little giggle as he cuddled closer to Mayuzumi_

  


_"There's nothing bad but thanks anyways" Said Mayuzumi as he stroke those red locks_

  


_"I promise, that face is the one I would be facing in front of the altar" Akashi retorted with a warm smile. Mayuzumi also smile at that promise_

  


Sad thing was that it never happens. Mayuzumi thought bitterly. Akashi didn't fulfill that promise. Maybe he will but with Nijimura

  


_**I wish that I could wake up with amnesia** _

_**And forget about the stupid little things** _

_**Like the way it felt to fall asleep next to you** _

_**And the memories I never can escape** _

  


_He watches as Akashi turn his back on him with his bags and his things that is valuable to him. Mayuzumi didn't bother to stop his lover. He was already leaving and not daring to look back. Mayuzumi didn't shed a single tear. Blankly waiting for Akashi to disappear in the distance. His back was slowly fading. Mayuzumi's chest hurts_

  


_'Don't leave... My love please don't leave me alone... Why would you leave me behind for another man..'_

  


_Mayuzumi tightly gripped the hem of his shirt as he watch his lover walked out of his life. His tears threatening to fall. He tried to hold it. Until he couldn't anymore. For the first time in a while. He cried_

  


_He went straight into their used to be room, burying his face on the pillow_

  


_'Please tell this is just some twisted dream. I should just wake up from it. And everything is okay again.. This is not true.. Please wake me up from this horrible reality...'_

  


_He fell asleep with tear strains on his cheeks_

  


_**If today I woke with you right beside me** _

_**Like all of this was just some twisted dreams** _

_**I'd hold you closer than I ever did before** _

_**And you'd never slip away** _

_**And you'd never hear me say** _

  


_Mayuzumi wakes up the next day. Feeling a bit confused to why there's no red haired male that always cuddling on him every morning. Then he remembers what happened yesterday. It was really not a dream. The bed feels empty as well as Mayuzumi. While gripping the sheets of the bed closer to him inhaling the smell of Akashi's scent that was left in there_

  


He recalls that day, and recalls how pathetic he looks like. Mayuzumi sat down on a bench after a long walk. Taking out his phone. Rummaging through his gallery. He saw the pictures of him and Akashi when they were still together. They look so perfect together. As some of their friends said they're a match made in heaven. Oh how cliche it sounds and cheesy. Mayuzumi didn't quite like it but still appreciate what they said about them

  


Now they would say such a shame they're not together anymore

  


_**I remember the day you told me you were leaving** _

_**I remember the tears running down your face** _

_**And the dreams you left behind you didn't need them** _

_**Like every single wish we ever made** _

  


_"Go on and leave. I won't bother to stop you" Mayuzumi said with a hint of coldness in his tone_

  


_As Akashi sniff he quickly grabbed his things out of their shared room_

  


_"As soon as I got out of this apartment forget all of the things. Forget everything that reminds you of me" Although it hurts to say for Akashi, he tried keeping his voice in control. Avoiding Mayuzumi's eye contact. It's no problem if he'll look at his face because Mayuzumi's face was blank_

  


_Only he wouldn't want to look at Mayuzumi's eyes because it was painful to look at. The sadness would be very visible and he's afraid that he might shed a single tear again_

  


_"Go now, my love" Mayuzumi said, although he wasn't the type of a person that would say those things he still do it. That made Akashi's chest tight and eyes watery_

  


_"C-Chihiro"_

  


_**I wish that I could wake up with amnesia** _

_**And forget about the stupid little things** _

_**Like the way it felt to fall asleep next to you** _

_**And the memories I never can escape** _

  


Until now Mayuzumi was still trapped in the past. Still believing that the pain would go away. That everything will go back to normal. But as the same time, he wanted to forget. He's having mixed feelings. He really wished it's easy to wake up with erased memories. So the pain wouldn't hold him back anymore

  


That Akashi would be back in his arms again

  


As he was rummaging through the media, he saw a certain post that made his hear ache a little

  


Akashi is already married to Nijimura. A picture of them in front of the altar. The marriage was held in LA

  


Mayuzumi lets out a bitter laugh. Oh how fate is playing bad to him. He remembers that promise Akashi said he would marry him

  


But he guess that was just Akashi's trial because the real one will be said to Nijimura. He is just a trial for Akashi. Everything Akashi did and said was just a practice

  


He had no choice but to be happy for him. Sending a 'congratulations' to them both. He saw Akashi already replied with a 'thank you' and a smiley face. Akashi looks really happy on the pictures together with Nijimura. It pains him that he will never smile like that again because of him. Looking at the picture a single tear fell down on the screen

  


"I'll just be happy for what you've achieved. Maybe in another universe.... It'll be our happy ending"

  


_**No, I'm really not fine at all** _

_**Tell me this is just a dream** _

_**Cause I'm really not fine at all** _

  


  


  


**Author's Note:**

> I hope it doesn't confused you much XD 
> 
> I felt a sudden urge to write an angsty fan fiction so here it is. I'm so bad I tortured Mayuzumi-sannnn
> 
> Should I write an alternative ending?


End file.
